lately again i have been struggling with a few things. one of them being how to not make this blog sound so negative or depressed. i guess these are the times that usually feel most like writing. it helps me to get feelings out there - so noone has to really bother with all my mess. but there are still going to be those posts - im quite sure. so i hope that you bear with me. i guess there is lots going on really - lots to be thankful for and some things that have just torn my heart to pieces. maybe some of those things to be thankful for will help mend my heart in some ways. at least i can hope...

most of you know that the czech republic seems to have a hold on my heart somehow. im not too sure why by any means - but it just seems to be in my heart. the country, the people, and the friends i still have there. one of the visions that i have had for prague started back with i visited dresden for the first time and saw the pub/prayer room there. i saw something very similar in prague. a place for people to go to talk to god- about god -or to just go and be. a safe place of sorts - one where you know people - and they know you. its something in my life i have always longed for. i love walking into my local and knowing people. having good conversation and being in that community. it is a bit odd - but somehow in those settings i have found more community than i have found in the places it should be - namely church. people are real in pubs. people are themselves. people dont mind asking for help - and putting themselves out there. which is why i think those few pub-prayer rooms do such amazing things for people.

so here is the funny part. seems that god is already working on this. through a few friends - i find out that there are a few other people whom i havent met yet - with a somewhat similar vision. only it includes a hostel. the more the merrier i say. seems that the timing is right and other things are lining up. i honestly never really thought that this would happen - but once again god just laughs at me. not a mean laughing - but one with him kinda smirking saying under his breath - "thats what you get for underestimating me punk!" well january is it - the start of yet another journey. who knows what it will hold. we shall see - so ill keep you abreast of the happenings. im excited...